Wrong Hole, No Goal, Cristiano Accused Of Rape

I think there may be a certain tax bracket where you feel exclusively entitled to anal sex. You’ve been getting F’d in the A for so long because you were on the bottom, so when you finally switch positions and you’re on top, it’s time to return the favor. Cristiano Ronaldo shares more in common with Kobe Bryant than you may realize. Not in the sense that they’re extremely well-paid athletes and run with a ball trying to stick it in a basket all day. But in the sodomy leading to a settlement sense. Cristiano is being accused of butt rape by a woman from Sin City.

In a civil suit filed in Nevada’s Clark County District Court last week, Kathryn Mayorga alleged that Ronaldo sexually assaulted her in a Las Vegas hotel room and later paid her $375,000 to cover up the incident, according to court documents available online.

Mayorga claims that Ronaldo’s team coerced her into signing a nondisclosure and settlement agreement in 2010. The lawsuit seeks to void the settlement and secure an additional $200,000 in damages.

The lawsuit claims that Ronaldo then allegedly barged into the bathroom, “exposed his erect penis and asked the plaintiff to perform fellatio.” Mayorga allegedly refused, said she wanted to leave and walked out of the bathroom. Ronaldo then allegedly pulled her “onto a bed and attempted to engage in sexual intercourse.”

Again, Mayorga claims she refused, covered herself and screamed “no, no, no,” but Ronaldo allegedly sodomized her. According to the suit, Mayorga alleges that Ronaldo apologized and stated that “he was usually a gentleman.”The Las Vegas Police Department confirmed responding to a call of sexual assault on June 13, 2009. At the time the report was taken, the victim provided neither a location of the incident nor a description of the suspect.Mayorga claims she suffered bodily injures including anal contusions, and has suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder and depression as a result of the alleged attack.

I’m pretty sure anal entry without prior consent is still only a misdemeanor in Vegas. Life is a little different in an area founded and funded by Mormons and mobsters.

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