Women Want to Learn How to Fap? Not on OUR Freaking App Store, They Don’t

What the balls, Apple? Have you seen the sort of craptacular on your store? Still, the line has to drawn somewhere, and that line is: lady-fapping.

Yes indeed, HappyPlayTime's developers were recently bitching that the tech titans refused their proposal. It's almost as though teaching women to masturbate wasn't something we could all fully condone, enjoy and gleefully consider teaching a course in. The world has gone effing mad.

Even so, we all know there are some things America is just not ready for. Touchscreen cooches on our iDevices, for instance. It's all just a little too radical. Sure, it has a relatively innocent, edutainment sort of a purpose, but this is still all kinds of weirdly weirdly weird. Those screenshots!

There are also, apparently, powerups. The mind boggles.

For more details on the sad plight of HappyPlayTime, hit Kotaku. Image from HappyPlayTime.