Victoria Silvstedt in a Bikini

If form followed function, this is how all ATM machines would be designed. Your balance would indicate your ability to access which slots. Don't be that dick who spends ten minutes pushing lots of buttons while there's a line behind you. I used to mock Victoria Silvstedt now I can only admire how she planned for her future so much smarter than I did. I'm checking my 401(K) monthly for any movement while she's riding some pudgy reciting the passcode to her Swiss bank account in her head three times over before screaming out something unnecessarily complimentary. If I really examined my anger I'm sure much of it is rooted in jealousy. Which is why I never examine.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI