The Weekly WTF: What the Eff is Your Deal, Pyramid Head?

In the survival horror genre, Resident Evil is the daddy. It may have died on its ass in recent installments, eschewing the horror for balls-out shooter ideals (there are more freaking bullets flying around than in the last half hour of Commando, right here), but that's moot. These mofos practically invented the genre in 1996, and that's good enough for us.

But there's another old stalwart of shit-your-pants gaming, which has been lurking about almost as long. Konami's Silent Hill is a more psychological affair, and its mascot antagonist, Pyramid Head, gives us all kinds of the willies. Let's grab our spare undercrackers and meet him.

This guy. This damn guy. At first glance, you'd be forgiven for thinking he looks a little mocktacular. You could say things like, ‘what the balls are you wearing on your head, dude,' or ‘hey, get your shit together, that's the rustiest kitchen knife I ever saw, you should take better care of your utensils,' and you'd be right. Let's be frank, he looks like a hobo with a bathtub on his head.

Still, as Grandma always said, beware of hobos with questionable taste in headwear. Those bastards are crazy.

Pyramid Head first appears in Silent Hill 2, lurking about menacingly and pervily at the Wood Side Apartments. In this instance, he simply effs with your radio signal and wanders away, but that's more than enough to tip you off: this guy's a dick, right here. Just in case there was any doubt, you'll later find him in one of the rooms, inappropriately touching/‘killing' a couple of mannequins. Just because he's an ass like that.

It's only later that he takes up his signature Great Knife and reveals his impalement-happy ways. We thought he was just a creepy sex criminal.

But this guy is no one-dimensional stalky killer. As we've said, Silent Hill is a deeper, think-y sort of experience, a franchise that thrusts its finger into your brain and swirls it around. There's a lot of talk about what this controversial creeptastic actually represents, what its function is. Just how many of them there are, perhaps. The ‘Red Pyramid Thing' has appeared as a duo on a couple of occassions, fighting Silent Hill 2 protagonist James Sunderland together.

Now, nobody wants two big ol' angry demented bastards chasing them with spears. That kind of thing would suck ass in and of itself, and could put a downer on your whole day. But Pyramid Head is more than just a boogeyman. In this case, it is symbolic of James's guilt at Maria's death (long-ass story at the Silent Hill wiki if you want to go into it). It's heavy stuff all around.

All in all, you could think of this thing as the thinking man's Resident Evil 5 Executioner Majini. Pyramid Head is a kind of simultaneous physical and mental torture, and that's just too much asshole for one man. Check him/it out in action below.