The Data Is In: Porn Is Really Popular

I've always suspected that most of the Internet is mostly made up of porn. The rest is videos of kittens and puppies and selfies of Amanda Bynes. It turns out I was right. A study by Paintbottle.com compiled from several studies show that 30% of all data transmitted on the Internet is for fap reasons. The popular site YouPorn uses 6 times more bandwidth than Hulu. Monthly hits to porn sites are more than Netflix, Amazon, and Twitter combined. Only YouTube gets more hits, (so I guess cute animals win). We all know that most men like to watch porn and a lot of women do too. It's so much easier to click on Iron Dong III: The Return Of Tony F$^k than have to think up stuff to whack it to. And yet porn still has a stigma attached to it. Isn't that a little hypocritical?

I say that if we want to keep watching porn we should celebrate it. If more people are watching movies starring Rod Thickpiece and Gee Gee Swallows or whatever than Gwyneth Paltrow or Tom Cruise's flicks, then why aren't they as famous? If we get enjoyment from their work, why should we judge them so harshly? Have most Hollywood movies stimulated you to the point of triggering a physical and emotional response? The only thing most movies make me feel is rage over the $14 I just paid to watch them. Either we need to stop watching porn or we need to stop pretending like we don't. Now if you'll excuse me, I am going to go watch Sliver Bangings Playbook.