Selena Gomez Upskirt in Boston

Everybody was buzzing over the weekend because you could see up Selena Gomez's skirt during her Boston concert. And, by everybody, I mean my oldest nephew who's secretary-treasurer of his school's A/V club and probably won't get much higher. He's not executive material. He couldn't even spot Selena's flesh colored underpants before he was raving to me about how Selena was busting out her vagina in Boston. I tried to explain to him that you don't ever see a vagina in Boston. They hide in the dark there beneath thick corduroy pants which if you're lucky you can get down high thigh high to try and perform a narrow target reproductive act while she intermittently curses and repeats the names of the important saints in the backseat of a car model that used to be much bigger twenty years ago. Half the time you discover you've been copulating that back middle seat hump for most of the past ten minutes. Still, she's Catholic, so even if you bust a nut on that god-forsaken part she's going to get pregnant. My nephew just smiled at me blankly and told me next year he gets the keys to the projector room.

Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin, FameFlynet