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Now Robots Are Getting Married

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Michael Garcia - August 13, 2016

Last year the Supreme Court made marriage equality the law of the land and many people on the right worried that now that people of the same gender can get married, what's next? The answer is two robots. In Japan, (natch), there was the first ever robot wedding. Now, this isn't some pervo marrying his Japanese sex bot. This is the nuptials of Frois, a square trashcan-like robot, and Yukirin, an android made to look like pop star Yuki Kashiwagi. The whole thing was officiated by a third robot named Pepper who works in a cell phone store. People paid $80 to attend. Yes, you read right, $80. They all got robot sliced cake which probably tastes funny, but whatever. This brings up a lot of questions for me.

First of all, by allowing robots to marry you are essentially acknowledging their personhood. Just like the U.S. government does at the end of Short Circuit 2 when they make Johnny 5 a citizen.  A thing cannot have personhood unless you are also saying that it is sentient in some way. As a rule sentient machines usually don't work out well for humans. It usually leads to our extermination by Skynet or what have you. I'm not saying that IF robots really are sentient they shouldn't be allowed to get married. If they truly can feel love then why not? I'm just afraid of the killing spree they are going to go on when the first robot divorce happens. 


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