Lena The Loser Spilled The Beans About Her Lonely Woes

Lena Dunham may be a loser but at least she’s fully aware of it. In true failure at life form Lena penned an essay about being sad and lonely. Her article primarily focuses on the break up with Jack Antonoff, but with so many words strung together that manages to ooze so much lose, when you read between the lines, you realize Lena is, and will always be, the problem. It would probably be better if she broke up with living altogether. I’m not encouraging her to kill herself because that’s wrong, but I am suggesting she quietly stand in a corner far away from the rest of us until God decides to call her number. Her first mistake was dating a heterosexual man whose sexuality is still up for debate after openly admitting to being aroused by Dunham. Lena looks like a pale pansexual middle-school victim of endless bullying. If that turns you on you should seek some therapy.

Lena writes in the June issue of Vogue that after she and Jack decided to call it quits, she moved out of the loft they shared together for four years and went back to her parents’ place. According to Lena, being in a relationship that long made her feel weird about being alone, and that social media made it weirder for her to be really alone. Eventually she was just texting anyone she knew, so that she wouldn’t be so lonely. She says that she took baby steps, first by taking a bath alone, then reading a poetry book by herself. Later she made her way to a restaurant where she ate a bread basket alone. Four months after her breakup, she was brave enough to leave the city for a solo weekend in the country. She eventually moved out of her parents’ house and into an apartment of her own.

So where does one even start when it comes to a lonely and sad little Lena. It surely can’t be her brand of selective feminism she turns on and off like a light switch that makes the men and women in her life disappear. I bet she’s awkward in real life like those home-schooled kids who never really learned how to properly interact with others their age while growing up. Being annoying and unattractive is certainly not the reason for Dunham’s loneliness. But maybe her social skills are to blame. They probably fall somewhere in-between certified sociopath and spineless serial stalker. I can see Lena being behind bars for accidentally showing up everywhere Antonoff happens to be and assaulting Lorde after she stole her man. Legend says a lonely Lena is a dangerous Dunham down to do almost anything. Everyone who needs to interact with it should probably proceed with caution when approaching it from now on.

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