Five Presidents’ Day Facts

Today is Presidents' Day, also known as a day the post office is closed but most people still have to go to work. The third Monday in February is traditionally the day in which we celebrate the rich dudes we've elected over the years to lead our nation...sort of. It's not like people are marching in parades in honor William Henry Harrison or John Tyler. There have been 44 presidents, but honestly how many of them can you name? Like, 12? Maybe? In ye olde times, nation's celebrated the birthdays of their kings and emperors with orgies and drink. In ancient Rome, the government made people sacrifice goats and pigeons and whatnot in honor off whatever psychopath was on the throne at the time. We have car sales. Lame. So, let me drop some science on Presidents' Day.