Everybody Down With Wonder Woman

Who knows if Wonder Woman will be the first decent DC comics movie adaptation in a very long time. Maybe so. Certainly so is the fact that you better say it is or your permanent record is going to be marked in sexist red.

Wonder Woman has become the crux on which female empowerment in Hollywood lives or dies. Female director, female superhero, it's been made clear among the studios, execs, and certainly to the media that being for or against Wonder Woman is your entire grade for the semester on gender equality.

Come out against the film and you will not be known as the critic who didn't dig the film, you'll be be known as the individual who hates women. You'll never work again in this town. Cliche. And nightmare reality. Check the big board. 97% opening on Rotten Tomatoes (that may fluctuate). It's Gandhi plus ten percent.

If this was a deep seeded conspiracy by Warner Bros. to ensure the critical success of Wonder Woman, kudos to their evil genius. More likely, good business fortune fell into their lap through mid-level executives in Hollywood sharing Facebook messages. Like a Pantsuit Nation sprung up for Diana, Princess of the Amazons. 

"Like the heroine at its center, Wonder Woman the movie rises with powerful grace above the noise" -- Lindsey Bahr, Associated Press

Are you describing a movie or sneaking the opening line to your Women in Hollywood awards dinner presentation? In fairness, the relative measuring stick is a shitty line of Superman movies.

Hollywood is in full fledged panic female empowerment mode. Sexist pig producers have transitioned overnight into fourth wave feminists with spot-on beta male accents. They're all getting Emily's List tattoos and insisting there's untapped genius in the women they've been fucking over for decades. It's a high time to be a white woman in Hollywood. Minority chicks not so much. White women are getting theirs.