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Sam Robeson - November 9, 2018
I'm huddled in the Dark Web bunker trying to avoid needing to Google the names of the roughly ten-thousand rando models who appeared in last night's Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. They're on every damn site. And they're not even naked. Just look like they were covered in jizz and rolled around a craft store. Kinda hot. But haven't people heard of hardcore Hobby Lobby porn? It's out there.
Anyway, Barbara Palvin was enough for this go-around. At least she can hang. It's all those burgers. Ol' Barb poops like a grizzly bear. Hot. Emily Ratajkowski is a perfect excuse to avoid the Vicky S. Mall Lingerie Show for the rest of the day, especially since she's still looking as freakishly amazing as ever. She looks more like a Japanese sex robot than Bella Hadid, and Emily's not even a Japanese sex robot. She recently added to her portfolio of fap-worthy Insta videos by shaking her ass around while behind what looks to be either a bar or a DJ booth at a moderately-attended gig. Basically, she's not wearing plastic feathers and stupid fucking puffy shoulder and arm warmers. Today's bar for success.
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Photo Credit: Instagram / Backgrid USA / MEGA
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