Coachella is for Losers Celebrities

Tara Reid gets her drink on at Coachella. (Pink is the New Blog)

More celeb pics from the Us Weekly Hot Hollywood party. (Hollywood Tuna)

Jessica Alba looks Fantastic. (Popoholic)

Get the Kim Kardashian sex tape while you still can. (DListed)

Elizabeth Hasslebeck's boobs are about to get really big again. (A Socialite's Life)

Check out Bruce Willis drunk at the Nets game. Now with Video! (CollegeHumor)

Angelina Jolie's health issues are none of your business. (IDLYITW)

Madonna's new do is a don't. (PopSugar)

Tom and Katie have dinner with... Brooke Shields! (Just Jared)

Jennifer Aniston is a Fembot. (CityRag)

Marc Anthony is J.Lo's purse. (Hollywood Rag)

Even the paparazzi are disgusted by Britney Spears. (CelebNewsWire)

Paris Hilton was there. Kimberly Stewart was there. Even Cameron Diaz was there. Why weren't you at Coachella? (MollyGood)