Egotastic
Up front let me say, I have no idea who half of the kid-land starlets of today are exactly. It's not exactly as if I'm perusing Nick shows during 'tween hour to get in solid chunks of laugh-track backed junior high comedies. However, my young concubine, the delightful Inez P. Minge, spends most of her days eating bulk licorice and watching Victorious, etc, so I got a bit of the insider's scoop.
At this weekend's Kids' Choice Awards Show, where essentially 12-year old girls pass judgement on what constitutes talent, the usual cast of celebrity characters made their marquee mark on the red carpet and on the stage, and, let's be honest, if 12-year old girls ran the world, we'd be in a shitload of trouble.
Still, the gathering was call to bring together a bunch of Hollywood hotties, young, and a bit older, all dressed in G-rated frocks that showed a lot of leg, but no cleavage, like lip gloss ad girls, cute, but without a hint of sexuality. Included among them were Katy Cocktease, whose team of publicists insist that she's happy, so she must be, Selena Gomez, who can't ever not look hot, Halston Sage, some young sextastic blonde with a made-up name form the Nick stable (and one of the few above 18 in the lineup, so we can actually officially call her 'hot), Ariana Grande, Heidi Klum, Victoria Justice, Ashley Tisdale, and a bevy of other farm system young model-actress types bursting at the teen seems to breakout into famous starlets. A fine mix of innocent with 'just discovered their naughty side' made for a fun evening. Enjoy.
Heidi Klum Goes Newly Single Sideboob Show for DKMS Gala
As you know, I am set to become the adopted son of Michelle Hunziker any day now, but since I still have some doubts as to whether or not she'll fully sign the adult son adoption papers, I'd be foolish to give up my backup moms plan. Included in my sweet hot MILFtastic Plan B are, of course, Stephanie Seymour, because I've seen how kindly she can be to her sons, and, Heidi Klum, the newly single hot German model mega-businesswoman mom who showed off her potential cougar chops with a sideboob baring dress at the DKMS Gala last night in N.Y.C.
Heidi is tall, hot, blonde, wealthy, and she already has like a gaggle of kids -- she'd barely even notice me joining the brood, save for wondering why I'm the one kid climbing into her bed each night telling her I had a bad dream. That is my good dream. Enjoy.
OH, FUTURE MAMA -- HEIDI KLUM WOULD BE THE BEST MOM EVER