Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: “Good Burger”

There are movies and TV shows that remind us of a simpler, happier time in our lives. A time before college loan payments and receding hairlines. This magical time was known as the 90's. It was a period of infinite possibilities and schlocky comedies galore. One TV channel had the market cornered on tween and kid entertainment in the 90's and that was Nickelodeon. They had amazing shows like Spongebob, Doug, and Rugrats. Nickelodeon also aired slightly unfunny sketch shows like All That. It was in the bowels of the All That writers' room that a sketch about two idiots working at a fast food joint took shape. That sketch would spin off into the crap masterpiece Good Burger.

The film stars the comedy team of Kenan Thompson and Kel Mitchell as Dexter and Ed. Dexter has to take a job at Good Burger in order to pay off a traffic accident, (that was actually caused by Ed). It's at Good Burger that he meets simple-minded Ed. Dexter takes to working at Good Burger, but all is not well. The insidious burger giant Mondo Burger moves in across the street and threatens to put Good Burger out of business. So, the boys invent a delicious sauce that no one can resist. When they use the scientific test of seeing which burger a dog prefers, they discover that something is wrong with the Mondo Burger. They then dress like old women, like you do, and sneak into the Mondo Burger factory. It's there that they discover that the meat is filled with a vaguely bad chemical. They are then put in a mental hospital to keep them from going public. They then escape by causing a dance number and Dexter and Ed steal an ice cream truck. They manage to pour the bad chemical into Mondo Burger's meat and then, just when the bad guy is going to get them, the Mondo Burger building explodes because the burgers have become bombs. Yes. Then everything is OK.

The plot is asinine, but then again, it's supposed to be. The wonderful thing about Good Burger is that it doesn't pretend to be something it's not. It knows it is a ridiculous piece of sh!t in which two teenage boys act like morons and dress like old women. It's not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination but that's what makes it so good. It does make me wonder what happened to Kel though. I hope he lives with Kenan and he rocks him to sleep at night and feeds him baby food. Is that weird?