Audrina Patridge Is Not Just a Hot Girl Without a Brain

Just kidding.

What can be learned from watching the premiere episode of Audrina, the creatively titled new Audrina Patridge reality show is that with the sound off, this former Hills star remains quite entertaining. As you know, in the past few weeks, I've developed something of an inappropriate lust-crush on Audrina's mom, Lynne Patridge, and I think I'm falling hard too for one of the sisters, and now there's an entire hot tub family orgy thing brewing in the part of my brain that even Father Calisimotta couldn't touch with his riding crop and his proverbs, but Audrina remains at the center of it all. Hot. Sexy. Kind of almost real. In the season opener, Audrina insists that she's not just an empty headed bikini and lingerie mannequin, and to prove it, she says a bunch of airheaded things while doing a bikini and lingerie calendar shoot. I'm not sure this Cali girl's elevator goes all the way to the top, but I am sure that every hottie in Hottieville smells Kardashian money and they're going for it hog wild. Enjoy.