Send The Gift Of Poo This Christmas

The holidays are quickly approaching and that means you have to spend your hard-earned dollars buying gifts for people. This is especially painful when you have to get something for someone you really don't like. We all have that cousin or coworker who is just a real pain in the ballsack but who you sometimes have to purchase a gift. You usually opt for something lame like a candle or a gift certificate to Chili's but that doesn't really say how you really feel. That's where a new mail order service called ShitExpress comes in. The Hong Kong based company will mail a box of poop to whoever you think really deserves it. This isn't chocolate pudding made to look like crap, either. It is real actual feces. For only $16.95 they will collect horse droppings, put it in an airtight container, and mail it from overseas to whoever you want. Ex-girlfriends, coworkers, an old boss, a neighbor, whoever you want.

I think this is brilliant in its honesty. We are so two-faced in our dealings with people that it would be nice to let someone know how you really feel through the gift of poopies. It leaves little up to interpretation when you receive a steaming pile of shit from someone. I know there is a long list of people I would like to mail some crap.