The Tickler Terrorizes Boston College

Boston College students have to contend with a new fiendish super villain that police have dubbed "the Tickler". This dirty boy likes to go around and...well...tickle people. He sneaks into college dorms and apartments and tickles people while they are asleep, which is pretty effing creepy. The police had thought that this serial tickler was a myth made up by drunk college students. He is not a legend, he's real. As one of his victims explains his run in with the dastardly tickler,

"I thought my friend was just trying to annoy me, but I soon realized it wasn't anyone I knew. I freaked out and sat up but he was already on the way out."

I'm not sure what's going on up there. What possible thrill can this guy get out of tickling people? I admit that I have a hard time understanding what motivates perverts today. What happened to the good old days of people flashing their wieners and strangers of looking at pictures of feet. It was a simpliler time before the internet. Back then perverts had to stick to five or six perversions. Now there are literally thousands. What's next? A guy who gets off on giving Indian Burns or Wet Willies?