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bill-swift - May 3, 2014
I grew up on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and they have a special place in my heart. I watched the old movies where the turtles wore martial artists in rubber suits about a thousand times. I loved the cartoon, the old video game, and the comic books too. That's why I find this trailer for the new TMNT movie so disturbing. Since when are the turtles eight feet tall? They are human sized. They look like fleshy green turds. Of course, I should have anticipated trouble when I saw the words Michael and Bay. Look, I can deal with the fact that nowadays the turtles were going to be CGI. But it could have been better CGI. Seriously, I can do better with an animation program on my iPad. It also looks too dark and serious. Come on, how can you take a ridiculous premise like radioactive martial arts turtles seriously? It's silly.
Of course, I'm going to see the movie. Because I'm an effing idiot. Maybe I can just mail Bay $14 and save myself the pain.
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