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Scarlett Johansson Perfect Greek Body

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Lex Jurgen - May 13, 2015


Taking a respite from their obsession with all things cock, the ancient Greeks invented what they referred to as the golden ratio of the female body based on tit to waist to hip measurements. It's like the old 36-24-26 bit but with real math that makes it less fun. A British lingerie company ran a bunch of celebrity measurements through the formula and discovered Scarlett Johansson most approximated the golden ratio. The entire top golden ratios bodies list contained a bunch of buxom hourglass actresses and Cameron Diaz who snuck in under the same rule that awards the girl with Down Syndrome the Homecoming Queen title at schools filled with teens from the third act of John Hughes movies. More importantly, anorexics now have a more classic reason to skip meals. Try telling Archimedes you feel beautiful the way you are. He knows exactly how much water you displace in the tub.

Photo Credit: WWTDD Archives


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