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Perry Done Being Petty; Found Inner Peace And Asks Forgiveness

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elliot-wolf - May 15, 2018

Taylor Swift and Katy Perry are done behaving like mean girls. Katy reached out and decided to end their ongoing dispute. She has sent Taylor a letter requesting peace and a literal olive branch. Because Hallmark cards asking for forgiveness along with a prop for a maximum dad-joke level apology normally ends feuds between pop stars. I’d like to know what substance Katy was on when she deciding sending her sworn enemy an olive branch from Whole Foods was a good idea. I’m guessing the Petsmart in the same plaza was fresh out of white doves for her to purchase and release after Taylor accepts her apology.

In a video shared on Taylor's Instagram Stories, Swift said, “I just got to my dressing room and found this actual olive branch. This means so much to me.”

“Hey Old Friend — I’ve been doing some reflecting on past miscommunications and hurt feelings between us,” Perry, 33, wrote in the partially obscured letter, in which she also wrote she was “deeply sorry” and wanted to “clear the air.”

Maybe the letter is laced with something. Katy is too kooky to be the forgiving type. My first thought was this could be Perry sending a Trojan horse. But seeing that Swift hasn’t keeled over and died from Anthrax, this must be an authentic apology. I hope the truce is short lived as a Katy and Taylor Swift song on the airwaves would surely symbolize the beginning of the apocalypse. 13-year-old girls all over the world would go around kissing other girls then saying things like “look what you made me do.” Avoiding accountability would be at an all-time high, sending humanity further down into the rabbit hole of debauchery, indecency, and easily forgettable radio-friendly Pop songs.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Instagram / Pacific Coast News


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