Morrissey Groped By Airport Security

Whiney faced singer Morrissey claims he was sexually assaulted by a TSA agent at the San Francisco International Airport although to be fair he's a serial victim, plus this is kind of a 'When in Rome' situation.

He later blogged about the ordeal while mascara ran down his face. It's unclear if he was crying due the alleged fondling or just sympathizing with the poor chicken sandwiches he laid eyes on at the Chili's To Go.

"I was approached by an ‘airport security officer' who stopped me, crouched before me and groped my penis and testicles... Should you find yourself traveling through San Francisco International Airport, you should expect sexual abuse from the so-called ‘security officers' who, we are unconvincingly warned, are acting only for our security."

The difference between a pat down and a groping is minimal. It would appear to boil down mostly to the facial expression of the person doing the touching. If they ask for you phone number after, file a complaint immediately. Is that a Molotov cocktail in your pocket or are you just happy to be here?