‘Mario Kart 8’ Thrills, Dizzies and Confuses in Dramatic New Airplane-Dodging Trailer (VIDEO)

Nintendo maintain a stubborn, almost overbearing grip on their biggest franchises. It's this don't leave me! Don't you effin' dare leave me! effect that keeps Mario, Zelda and such coming at us year after year after year. And so we arrive at the eighth main installment of Mario Kart. Hold on to your butts, balls and man-boobs, because this time they're ramping up the crazy. Vertical driving shenanigans, anyone?

Mario Kart 8 is already, inevitably, one of the biggest games of 2014. It's sure to keep a merry band of Japanese businessmen in impeccable business suits, sensible Asian haircuts and pricey prostitutes for some time to come. How do we know? Because of the word Mario emblazoned on the front of the box there. When accompanied by the word Kart, that's a guaranteed ticket to cash-amundo.

So how's the game shaping up? Quite remarkably, it seems. Take a look above, as gameXplain garner some sensible gameplay nuggets from the fragmented shitstorm Nintendo have provided thus far. Have you ever wanted to fly a craptastic glider around an approaching airplane, mere inches from a blood-splattery mid-air death? Of course you have, who in holy hell hasn't? Mario Kart 8 is poised to realize this dream with the new Sunshine Airport track, and many more. Behold!

Via Destructoid, image from GamerZines.