Maria Jade Smokeshow In A Dental Floss Bikini

Maria Jade is doing a great service to society by wearing a bikini like that, because instead of only having the images of scantily clad women occupying my mind I now also have thoughts of my dental hygiene front and center. That’s a valuable gift from Maria, I cannot remember flossing today (nor any other day) and now I am about to do it. Maria is basically a doctor without borders, or a medical degree.

On a semi-related note, if you find yourself without a proper cheese slicer, dental floss will work in a pinch. But be sure to not use that piece to then floss with, it kind of defeats the purpose. Oddly enough, real dental floss does not work so great for real bikinis. When tied tight enough it will start treating the body like a block of cheese.

After a heavy day of beach frolicking the genitals will end up resembling Pinhead. That might be a fetish for some, but those are not the kind of people that women should be associating with. Just cough up the cash for a legitimate thong that has undergone safety testing.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA