Jen Selter Shows Off Her Ass In Miami Beach

Jen Selter is a shoreline goddess in one of the shortest fitting hoodies I’ve ever seen. It’s my assumption that she has either mugged a midget or some unlucky child before this recent photoshoot. If my sticky finger theory is true, she is a very bad lady and it’s making me think very bad thoughts about her in the best of ways. Right after helping her locate the little person from which she highjacked her current hoody, I’d help her find the courage to return the article of clothing and apologize for her actions. She obviously has a lot on her mind if she’s wearing winter tops while at the beach. 

Selter looks good enough to swim across an entire ocean to reach. I’d go above and beyond for someone as beautiful as her. And I’m also willing to help her out when she runs into other troubles like the one she seems to be having about whether or not to keep her pants on. Taking your pants off in public can be a tough decision but sometimes it’s just too darn hot outside. I know the fear of leaving your pants unattended too long all too well. If she had me there I would have been eager to guard her garment without the slightest complaint. She would never have to worry about anything around me.  

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA