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Sam Robeson - April 13, 2018
First off, while trying to kill time on a Friday, I googled church quotes for this post, and came across this one from Justin Bieber: "You don't need to go to church to be a Christian. If you go to Taco Bell, that doesn't make you a taco." Assuming he was reading out of the Hillsong Bible. Anyway, Ariel Winter feels very 2016, and since any girl with back rolls and daddy issues can become a body-positive social media sensation, I'm just not sure we're going to have room in our lives for Winter unless she releases a sex tape. Called... The Little Spermaid.
Until then she's become pretty useless, but the Internet hasn't caught on to this revelation yet, and recently gave Winter shit for dressing like a Kardashian in heat at a funeral while Winter attended Easter mass. We know where she hides the eggs. Her fat vag. In two InstagramĀ pics, Winter can be seen showing off her legs in a short black dress in front of her Greek church. My coworker just said "I thought that was a normal look for Greeks." Racist much.
Personally, I think it's amazing that Ariel doesn't look like a complete monster, but the h8ers are indeed going to h8, and are giving Winter just enough clap-back fodder to get her through another day of mid-tier stardom with comments shaming her revealing look. Honestly, if people didn't slut shame or body shame or what the hell ever Winter, what would she even do with her life? Not a joke. I seriously don't know.
Photo Credit: Instagram
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