Awesomely Horrible Netflix Instant Films: “The Fifth Element”

What makes a great science fiction movie? Or, for our purposes, what makes an awesomely horrible one? You need a goofy future where the rules aren't entirely clear but honestly, who cares about the rules? Throw in some silly effects, dudes in rubber masks, and a scantily clad hot chick and you are half the way there. But you need a star, right? How about Bruce Willis with blond hair. Sure, why not? But wait, you need a villain. How about Gary Oldman with a weird Texas accent. Of course! Finally, Chris Tucker as a flamboyant preening homosexual is needed...nay demanded. Why has no one thought of this before? Luc Besson thought of it over a period of 20 years when he developed the wonderfully over the top schlocktropiece The Fifth Element.

The Fifth Element stars Bruce Willis as Dallas, a grizzled cab driver in New York City two hundred years from now. He accidentally meets an alien named LeeLoo, played by Mila Jovovich in a tight dress made of rubber strips. LeeLoo is the Fifth Element, the secret component of a super weapon left on Earth by some aliens called the Mondoshawans capable of destroying an evil that appears every 5000 years. Jean-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg, (played with scene chewing glory by Gary Oldman), has been hired by the great evil to stop the Fifth Element. It's then up to Dallas and LeeLoo to get to an ancient Egyptian ruin thing in time for LeeLoo to destroy the evil or something. Who cares? There are a lot of flashing lights and cool stuff to look at.

The Fifth Element did pretty darn good at the box office and is a damn entertaining movie. But it's goofy as hell. Like, for serious go watch it again. It has Luke Perry in it. That alone knocks it down a few notches. The writing is bizarre and the story is confusing but it is a visually stunning movie. Everything from the costumes that were designed by Jean Paul Gaultier to the pre-CGI visual effects are sheer eye candy. It also introduced the acting world to Mila. There would be no Resident Evil movies has there been no Fifth Element. It's good stuff.