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Lex Jurgen - June 15, 2017
Ariel Winter snapped a series of photos wherein she and her boyfriend who reeks of unemployability got multiple matching and complementary tattoos. You're going to be together forever, so why not dive-in to subdermal permanence. Winter also snapped some extra photos of her tight shorts scrunching up into her snatch because she's a consummate pleaser.
If you're looking for signs that you're not only making a bad decision, but not a novel one at that, do something Kylie Jenner did but a few days earlier. It's a strong indicator the Army might use to identify you as more cannon fodder than tactical leader.
Winter is working her way through all the stages of teenaged female rebellion, and doing so in a compressed timeline. The loser older boyfriend, the peekaboo tit shots, the wild colored hair, the not giving a shit about being too far for those tiny shorts. Now, the tattoos simply for a lark. Even Queequeg couldn't decipher the tattoos on his body, but assume they were more than a cheeky afterthought following three kamikazes at Barney's Beanery.
Because nobody in power gives a shit about what happens when child actors turn into semi-grown adults with tits and substance abuse problems, Winters' delayed puberty rebellion is covered quaintly by the women's magazines. If not as a sign of feminist empowerment. It's a reflex in the media where hyperbolic praising is immensely more relatable to young women than any form of judgement.
When Winter's estranged mom said she was worried her daughter was spending her days flashing her tits and vagina on social media, everybody laughed. As if that was an absurd concerned. Nobody ever liked the overbearing uptight mom character, but deep down we used to understand she served a purpose.
Photo Credit: Snapchat
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