Lindsay violated probation, due back in court today

Hopefully no one actually believed Lindsay Lohan when yesterdays interview with Life and Style came out, and she claimed to be sober now:

She insists, there is no booze, no matter what.
"When my friends come over, they're not drinking," she notes. "Alcohol is not in my house, so it's just not a part of my life."

Because of course that was a lie, just like all the other times she's lied about the exact same thing, and now...

Lindsay Lohan has violated the terms of her probation by testing positive for alcohol on June 12 or June 13, and has been ordered to appear in front of Judge Stephanie Sautner at the LAX Airport Courthouse Thursday morning for a probation violation hearing, Radar has exclusively learned.
"Lindsay tested positive for alcohol. The judge in her DUI case, Judge Elden Fox said she couldn't consume any alcohol while on probation. The probation department has prepared a report, and Lindsay will be in court (today)."

God I wish I were a judge. Not only would I lock Lindsay up, but I would do it personally and trick her into walking into a room that she thought we were gonna smoke weed in but was actually an old timey cage, and then I'd yell "get comfortable, bitch" as I slammed the door.