Flamethrower Weapon Of Your Fantasy Is Now A Reality

Elon Musk made a flamethrower that looks much more fun than the miniature Bic lighter and aerosol can combo that you’ve been using to scare small children and small dogs. Now for a mere $500 you’re able to buy a real flamethrower that looks like a rare item in a Call Of Duty Advanced Warfare supply drop. The fact that most people are surprised that selling flamethrowers are legal shows how most Americans aren’t aware of laws. Hopefully you won’t ever need to purchase one because a World War Z zombie apocalypse isn’t around the corner but it’s important to know that as an American you’re legally allowed to arm yourself with weapons best used for killing hordes of the undead.

The same entrepreneur who wants to save the earth from fossil fuels also looks like he wants to burn it down in style, offering up a $500 flamethrower from The Boring Company — his underground tunnel company looking to alleviate traffic. And so far, they’re selling like hot cakes.

I’m not sure what Elon Musk will do with an extra $10 million in sales besides use the money to payout a pile of inevitable lawsuits. The potential for things to go wrong is very high when selling flamethrowers to the same people who swallow Tide pods on purpose. Since ethics threw Darwinism out the window and the stupid are allowed to keep breeding and evolve it’s only a matter of time before someone mistakes the flamethrower for a water gun and burns a child alive.

Don’t do this. Also, I want to be clear that a flamethrower is a super terrible idea. Definitely don’t buy one. Unless you like fun.

A post shared by Elon Musk (@elonmusk) on Jan 27, 2018 at 5:29pm PST

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News / Splash News