Model Pixie Geldof’s Smokin Hot Paddleboard Bikini Candids

Despite my bias against paddleboards, the one good thing that has come from them is that it has gotten women like Pixie Geldof into bikinis to stand where they can clearly be seen by all.

The terrible thing about a beach is that when a girl is in the water, all of her good bits are obscured. Even when you can make out parts they are so distorted it looks like Picasso was her father. But when she is on the beach, and things are visible, there are usually so many people around that you hardly can get a good view without some beach whale ruining it for you. And I do not have the motivation to go walking around at the beach just to look at boobs when I can see better ones while sitting on my ass and looking at my phone.

The paddleboard, though, makes it so that a girl stands out above everyone. You can even pretend you’re just looking at the waves because they are beautiful, or some shit. And while the girl is out there paddling she is using all sorts of muscles, so her body looks even better than when she is just sunbathing like a dead fish.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA