Iggy Azalea Shows Off Her Shape At The Jumanji Music Festival

Usually the only time that I see a woman by a tractor trailer is when she is printed on the mudflap. Why Iggy decided to pose in front Chet’s semi is a mystery to me, but I suppose beggars cannot be choosers. For that same reason I suppose I should not be too critical of the boots that look like they cut off of an elephant’s trunk, or of the blouse that appears to be made out of the scraps swept up from the floor of a sweatshop.

What is throwing me off more than her wardrobe is the appearance of her hand in relation to the rest of her body. Was her left hand amputated recently and no one thought to inform me? It looks like she snatched that hand off of an American Girl Doll and hoped no one would notice.

Now I am sitting here self-conscious of my own hands. How small is too small? If I can fit my full fist into my mouth does that mean my hand is small, or that my mouth is big? It seems like it could go either way. I am forced to wear women’s wrist watches after all.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA / Instagram