Do Your Global Civic Duty: Miss Bum Bum Brazil 2012

Maybe it's because I have an unlimited pass to Epcot Center, or maybe because I used to buy my weed at the subway stop around the corner of the U.N., but I like to think of myself not as a citizen of the United States, but as a citizen of the Planet Earth. And like they say, sometimes to act globally, you've got to act locally (this post is in no way an endorsement for local theater acting; that's not what I'm talking about).

I'm talking about journeying around the world to find the best local events to give you a flavor for all your planet has to offer its citizens. Sometimes that means religious festivals, or maybe a street fair, but today it means the best butts Rio has to offer. That's right, I'm talking the Miss Bum Bum Brazil contest of 2012, featuring some of the shapliest, juciest and most finely proportioned derriers to prance their way through carnivale.

Why should Brazilian proctologists get all the fun? With Miss Bum Bum Brazil 2012, even you can feast your eyes on more cheeks than Sir Mix-a-Lot would even know what to do with. So remember, be a citizen of the world, yearn to learn more about our planet, but more specifically about our planet's fine ass.

They're calling my flight so check out the gallery of all of Miss Bum Bum's best contestants as I board my plane and hopscotch to once again do my global civic duty.