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bill-swift - July 31, 2015
Mariah Carrey was her usual bouncy busty self at the Hallmark Party in LA. Some people wonder what the secret is to Mariah's phenomenal vocal range. I think I have an idea. I think her ginormous knockers give her extra lung capacity so she's able to hit those really high notes. This is just a theory, of course. In order to prove it I would have to get up close and personal and really study Mariah's chesticles to come to a true determination. But her body guards won't let me conduct my research. Bastards. So, for now I will have to glance at those round mounds of fleshy goodness from afar and conduct my "research" in private.
I remember back when I was in high school and Mariah was first coming up that she was a hottie mchottiepants back then. It's amazing that we are still talking about how incredibly sexy she is twenty years later. That's staying power, buddy.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
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