Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Might be Married

As you probably know by now, I think Tom Cruise is a tool (and frankly so should you). I loathe writing about him, and his year-long publicity stunt "relationship" with Katie Holmes, but there doesn't seem to be much else going on today, and I thought I'd vent a little.

So the big un-news today is that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes may have secretly gotten married in a Scientology ceremony nearly 8 months ago, according to the National Enquirer, via The New York Daily News.

One of the church's chaplains married the couple early last July in a ceremony at sea, according to The National Enquirer.

Cruise and Holmes, who met a few months earlier, are said to have exchanged rings emblazoned with triangular Scientology symbols during a Caribbean cruise aboard the sect's ship the Freewinds. (They supposedly wear their rings only at church functions.) Holmes, who once claimed she would remain virginal until her wedding day, wore white, says the tab.

After the ceremony, the couple walked across a tiny bridge -- a Scientology symbol for the journey to "total freedom," sources claim. Scientologists John Travolta and Kirstie Alley are said to have been on the ship, where guests also celebrated Cruise's 43rd birthday.

Holmes' Catholic family was not present, but is due to attend their "official" wedding later this year.

Yesterday, a rep for the couple insisted, "They have not yet wed, and are continuing to move forward with their plans for the big day." (Chances are that will be after Tom's ex Nicole Kidman has hers, which is now rumored to be in Nashville, where her beau, Keith Urban, has a home.)

So, the gossip world is all over this very possibly untrue story of a marriage that may or may not be legally binding, and that the couple denies ever even happened. That's great. And didn't Katie Holmes say that she was waiting to get married before having sex? And isn't Tom Cruise a tool?