Britney Spears is Not the Best Mom, But Paris Hilton Doesn’t Care

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Britney Spears is once again under the watchful eye of the Los Angeles Department of Children & Family Services, reports Page Six. The agency that looked into her suitability as a parent when pictures were released of Britney driving with her baby in her lap is again checking in on the star after her crazy, drunken escapades of late.

A source close to the singer said, "The department has been calling Britney trying to set up a meeting with her, so they can check on [Spears' baby sons Sean Preston and Jaden James]. The calls started after this recent bout of bizarre public behavior."

Her family is aghast at her all-night partying with Hilton and [Brandon] Davis and were mortified when, on four separate occasions, Spears was shot by paparazzi not wearing any underwear.

The family source said her mother, Lynne, "is very disturbed and has been trying to get a hold of Britney, but she can't. Lynne, Britney's brother, Brian, and her dad, Jamie, are very upset and are trying to stage an intervention with [Spears' manager] Larry Rudolph's help."

Of course, none of Britney's apparent shortcomings as a mother seem to have any effect on her new BFF and co-member of the Brain Trust, Paris Hilton. According to MSNBC, hanging out with Britney and her kids has made Hilton want to have kids of her own, but probably just because it's the new must-have accessory, and so much cuter than a shaved chihuahua.

"It's been my dream to have four babies by 30," the 25-year-old heiress announced, reports Life & Style Weekly. And Hilton thinks she's highly qualified for motherhood, explaining: "I look after animals, so I'd have a lot to give my kids."

In fact, looking after kiddies has become so appealing to Hilton that she recently cut short a night out with Spears, announcing to friends, "We're going home to the babies. We miss them."

Now, I'm not one to espouse the tenants of Eugenics, but I think there might be cause to make a few exceptions. Or as Bob Barker says, remember to spay or neuter your pets. Well, both Paris and Britney need to be spayed or neutered, I can never remember which is which. All I do know is that if these two are allowed to reproduce at will, the world, as we know it, is doomed. DOOMED!!!

Photo credit: Flynet