Natalie Portman

Moneymoon

Egotastic! sendsĀ Kim Kardashian sex tape sales to new climax highs. (FoxNews)

Natalie Portman is back! (HuffPo)

Great men of history's great pick-up lines. (CollegeHumor)

Zoe Saldana sexes up Miami. (GlobalGrind)

Hot chicks forgetting to wear bras. (TheChive)

Is Selena Gomez a free woman? (GossipCop)

Kate Middleton and Pippa Middleton hit the beach. (SocialiteLife)

MSM Weekly Unclothed Roundup Includes Bianca Kajlich, Natalie Portman, and Phoebe Cates (VIDEO)

 

It's hot town summer in the city this time of August, the perfect global warming temperature for a little air-conditioned cinematic pleasure time, with a roadmap for indoor viewing options courtesy of the Mr. Skin Minute from of our friends atĀ Mr. Skin.

This weeks boobtastic film selections include Bianca Kajlich in 30 Minutes or Less, Natalie Portman and her hot hindness available on DVD, and Phoebe Cates in an all-time Mr. Skin classic moment. Enjoy.

Weekend Links

Christina Hendricks busts out of her dress. (GossipCenter)

Happy birthday to our favorite Hebrew School Hottie, Natalie Portman. (HuffPo)

Gisele Bundchen looks damn good in a dress. (Celebuzz)

Say goodbye to weird teens having sex on TV. (FoxNews)

Jarah Marianos sexy lingerie spread. (Popoholic)

Salma Hayek apple bottom awesomeness. (LaineyGossip)

Estonian hottie singing sensation Kerli gets naughty with a friend. (Buzznet)

Weekend Links

Taylor Momsen sexes up Hollywood. (Buzznet)

Nicole Scherzinger wants it "Right There." (Celebuzz)

JWoww sexy but effin' crazy. (FoxNews)

Coco squeezes into some tight pants. (HuffPo)

Christina Hendricks big boob fun. (TheChive)

Natalie Portman and the hottest Members of the Tribe for Passover. (Ranker)

Anna Paquin flashes some sexy leg. (Popoholic)

Natalie Portman Amazing New Backside Thong Shots from Your Highness

Okay, still two weeks to go until Your Highness has me eating a popcorn and gummy bear mix in Row J of the theaters, and I'm already pretty damn geeked. Sure, the film itself is going to be golden funny, but ten years from now, will I remember all the LOL bits or will my mind focus like a librarian's Dewey Decimal beam on the sweet sweet Natalie Portman cinematic ass-shots? Now that she's been impregnated by the ballerina dude named after my favorite arcade game ever, these epic thong shots of this Hebrew School hottie become that much more precious, both in deed and in the virtual world of hot celebrity asses that occupies about seventy-odd percent of my frontal lobe. If you don't give these Natalie Portman pictures a solid ten minute unblinking stare, you simply don't love hot asstastic as much as you should and you should probably consult your doctor. Enjoy.

After the Oscars: Selena Gomez and Jessica Biel and Other Hotties at the Vanity Fair After Party

After the film industry-wide circle jerk concludes, and the lights go down on the Kodak theater, the real parties in Hollywood begin. None more important each year than Vanity Fair event, where the magazine brings out all the big names, most of which weren't actually close to being Oscar worthy, but, still hot, including this year my niece/girlfriend Selena Gomez (yeah, we cut the midget out of the picture), Taylor Swift looking all gold and on top of the world, Natalie Portman fresh off her Best Actress win, Jessica Biel, who I miss dearly, Brooklyn Decker, who I can't get enough of, the Glee sisters, Dianna Agron and Lea Michele, and Nordic blonde twinsies Cameron Diaz Gwynneth Paltrow, Charlize Theron, veteran hottie, Jennifer Hudson, whose miracle cleavage was one of the stars of the Oscars, and Kate Beckinsale, forever ridiculously sexy. In short, if everybody had stripped off their clothes and jumped into the pool, it would've been very close to a recurring and very private day dream of mine. (Still, Gino's Pizza Rolls nuked from the garage freezer deep thaw, a La-Z-Boy recliner, and a glass of adult milk is nothing to sneeze at for an Oscar's after-party either.) Enjoy.

Photo credit: Getty Images / Splash News

W Magazine Features A Futuristic Gaggle of Hollywood Leading Ladies

What can be said of a list of sexy celebrities that includes Natalie Portman, Dakota Fanning, Mila Kunis, Julianne Moore, and Nicole Kidman? Well, one one word that comes to mind immediately is engorgement; it's a technical term describing what it might be like to be trapped for days on end in a gorge with the likes of these sextastic actresses. Sort of like my naughty dream version of 127 Hours, only it's not my arm that would be stuck in the rocks. These five are also celebrity hotties featured in the upcoming edition of W Magazine, and given that the 'W' stands for not for dudes, these pictures are on the inexplicably artsy side, but, no denying, they're still most definitely for dudes. Enjoy.