Chrissy Teigen

Chrissy Teigen Drops the Norske Hotness in Esquire

We do so lust pretty much anything and everything Chrissy Teigen related. The Thai-Norwegian hottie forecasts for us how hot this entire planet will become when attractive people from all cultures and backgrounds can freely bang the shizz out of each other and produce amazing looking offspring. In her latest mini-pictorial in Esquire magazine, Chrissy shows off her playful side, while we imagine playing with her super hot body.

Hey, honesty is always the best policy. Enjoy.

Nina Agdal vs. Chrissy Teigen for Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Magazine Bikini Hotness Battle

UPDATESorry to all, but mostly to myself, but Sports Illustrated has decided they no longer wish to share these beautiful photographs of beautiful models so they had to be removed. Please forgive the wet floors, that's from my tears of sorrow.

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Last week we saw the photoshoot spreads, now, the publication photos and this morning feeling like we need a good battle between a couple of the real standout hotties in this year's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, namely, Nina Agdal, the Danish princess for whom we predicted a monster breakout 2012 year of Nina-hotness, and Chrissy Teigen, who we begged for years to make babies with us, so we could have Eurasian-Egotastic offspring, but she went and ruined everything by getting engaged to John Legend. Still, she looks damn hot in a bikini; so our feelings remain bittersweet (and mostly sweet).

Bikini on bikini. There will be no blood shed. But you'd still better lay down the plastic sheets, if you know what I'm saying. Enjoy.

Alyssa Miller and Izabel Goulart Lead List of Super Hotties at Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Kick-Off Party

Well, yes of course there's going to be a bevy of beauty at a kick-off party for the 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition because the party is all about honoring the world-class bikini models currently filling the pages of the magazine. And, yes, of course, somehow, our invitation got lost in the mail. Which is pretty unfortunate, because we had already purchased our six-legged Southwest Airlines ticket to get across the country (I think one leg of the Southwest trip involved taking off from Topeka then landing at the other side of the airport.)

While all the ladies of my current dreams looked exceedingly hot last night, Alyssa Miller and Izabel Goulart probably stole the hottie crown for the evening, and that's saying a ton at a party with the likes of Nina Agdal, Cintia Dicker, Chrissy Teigen, Kate Upton, and Bar Refaeli. Now, that's a prime time pimping guest list.. Enjoy.

More 2012 SI Swimsuit Hotness: Chrissy Teigen, Izabel Goulart, and Genevieve Morton

UPDATESorry to all, but mostly to myself, but Sports Illustrated has decided they no longer wish to share these beautiful photographs of beautiful models so they had to be removed. Please forgive the wet floors, that's from my tears of sorrow.

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And the bikini just keep on rolling on.

Sports Illustrated has come a long way since the cover model and a few interior shots of supermodel hotties in two-piece bathing suits. Now, it's a monster pictorial jam of exotic beauties in exotic locations flashing exotic bodies. This is what we call progress. Not that the old school SI Swimsuit Editions didn't produce a ton of classic hot bikini moments, much to the benefit of fapping sports fans from generations past.

Adding to the seemingly never ending list of bikini sextastic models in the 2012 edition are smoking-sexy Eurasian Chrissy Teigen, Brazilian supermodel Izabel Goulart, and South African super busty swimsuit model, Genevieve Morton. Like a United Nations of super beach hotness. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Swimsuit Outtakes Take Us Out of Our Minds With Lust

Okay, so our dear friend and wicked hot Eurasian model Chrissy Teigen went off and agreed to marry John Legend, and our hearts sank a bit at the prospects of losing one of single-doms finest, but that doesn't mean we're going to stop staring and drooling.

You mix Norwegian with Thai and you basically come out with visual Viagra, never more true than with Chrissy, who in these brief bit of outtakes from her DiNeila swimsuit photoshoot shows why we lust this little minx like a dog does his dinner. But we promise not to use our teeth. Enjoy.

Kate Upton and Maria Menounous Headline the Weekend’s Hotter Football Game

The DirecTV Beach Bowl has become an annul Super Bowl weekend tradition now, and any tradition that involves gathering up a half-dozen or so super sporty hotties to play flag football in the sand, well, call me a traditionalist because it's one of my favorite times of the entire Super Bowl weekend.

This lists cast of sextastic players included the bouncy flouncy Kate Upton, uber-Grecian hottie Maria Menounos, vastly underappreciated brunette deliciosa, Nina Dobrev, and out hottie Eurasian model friend, Chrissy Teigen, forming a scrum very close to the see-ball, fondle-ball sporting games of my nightly fantasies. Hot chicks playing sports, there may never be a more passion-inducing combination. Enjoy.